Murray Bowen-The Creator of Family systems theory-Father of Family Therapy
Family Systems Theory provides clinicians a pragmatic and functional insight into the emotional workings of our families. We must understand we are all, ALWAYS bouncing of and around the emotions of those we are closest to.
The Gottman's- Evidence based prof of what makes relationships flourish
The Gottman Method is an approach to couples therapy that includes a thorough assessment of the couple relationship and integrates research-based interventions based on the Sound Relationship House Theory.
EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN A FAMILY IS A REACTION TO ANOTHER PART OF THE FAMILY.
NOTHING HAPPENS BY ITSELF
I have placed the articles on each side to frame my learning in this complex area. I first became a Marriage and Family Therapist when I lived in Southern California. The practice of Family Therapy began there and the notion that nothing happens in a vacuum made perfect sense to me. We are always emotionally acting and reacting to the actions and events of those around us. The closer, the more intimate, the more vital the relationship, the bigger the emotional reactions. After my move to Buffalo, NY I began to work with individuals with Developmental Disabilities and children and teens in at risk situations and soon realized I needed more tools. This drove me to earn my Board Certification in Behavior Analysis. Together, this blend has provided a strong and unique view into the nature of our challenges and provided many useful interventions to get us out.
I work to help couples and families discover and de-personalize the current patterns of behavior which are causing pain and put into place clear steps to reduce challenging behaviors. Once we can recognize the steps in the negative dance we can begin to de-escalate the tension and slowly allow the joy and hope of love to re-enter the relationship/s. This also hold true for families dealing with the impact of a child with a physical, developmental, or emotional disability.
I often get a call from a parent stating challenges with a child and needing immediate intervention. While it is absolutely true that current situations are unacceptable, and I provide interventions to manage the moment, the true transformations begin when we can assess and attack the challenges as a family problem. I always focus on the larger messages at play. As we learn to understand the bigger picture, our little changes, day by day, begin to take on greater significance.
Changing our family and relationship dynamics takes work!! AND there is no Greater Work!
Trust in the process, Allow time, you will experience more Love in Your Life!
B.F. Skinner-The father of Modern Behaviorsm
Behavior analysis is a natural science that seeks to understand the behavior of individuals. The principles and techniques discovered by behavior analysts have proven useful in helping individuals improve their own behavior and those of other individuals about whom they care. (From ABAInternational.com)
Dr. Sue Johnson-Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy
EFT (Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy) was created in tandem with Adult Attachment Theory. Attachment Theory helps us understand why it hurts so much, and why we react as we do when we don’t feel connected to the one’s we love. EFT allows clinicians to assist couples to understand and regulate emotions so they can feel safer to share the love they desire.